>> Why We Have This Emotion
When our efforts aren't rewarded, that dull ache and irritation push us to speak up, change our strategies, and invest in people who value us more. It helps us avoid being exploited.
◎ What to do in the moment
Good Ideas
- Name the effort you want to be seen
- Celebrate your own wins in writing
- Notice who appreciates your efforts
- Adjust boundaries around takers
- Say no to taking on unpaid labor
- Clearly request the support you need: appreciation? control? reassurance?
Bad Ideas
- Expect others to read your mind
- Do even more unpaid, invisible work
- Stay where you're being exploited
- Sabotage to “prove” your importance
- Ruminate about how unfair it is
- Compare recognition with others
- Equate praise with having value